I find myself more and more discouraged by how people are pulling away from each other to shout insults and blame each other. There is part of me who also wants to join in the anger; however, I take a moment and remind myself of Daryl Davis (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daryl_Davis).
He is a black musician who sought out members of the KKK to ask them the question of “why do you hate me when you know nothing about me?” By being open to listening to their prejudiced ideas, he was able to help educate KKK members about black people. His conversation led to many people leaving the KKK, including a KKK Imperial Wizard.
From Wikipedia:
Davis believes education is the best remedy for curing hate: “[If] you fix the ignorance, there’s nothing to fear. If there’s nothing to fear, there’s nothing to hate. If there’s nothing to hate, there’s nothing or no one to destroy”
So, how to start a conversation? Should you even try with someone who only screams online? Don’t you need to keep boundaries from others you find toxic?
Another example that inspires me is Megan Phelps-Roper in her TED talk (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bVV2Zk88beY) on why she left the Westboro Baptist Church. She was raised in the church, repeating slogans of “God hates…” and public protests. She shares that when strangers engaged her in civil conversation, she learned to see the people she was supposed to hate as fellow human beings and find friendship with them. She gives four principles for dialogue conversations:
- Don’t assume bad intent
- Ask questions
- Stay calm
- Make the argument
She ends her talk with this summary:
“Each one of us contributes to our communities and the cultures and the societies that we make up. The end of this spiral of rage and blame begins with one person who refuses to indulge these destructive, seductive impulses. We just have to decide that it’s going to start with us.”
I am going to be diving back into art with the non-profit this fall. I would like to create conversations and community through art. I will be creating and sharing art but also providing insights and instructions on how you can create your own art.
Creating and sharing art has a lot of vulnerability wrapped around it. Many have shared with me the art shame they learned as kids, so they stopped creating.
My hope is to create a community of creativity, curiosity, and kindness. It would be a safe space to explore and grow. I have told people the analogy that everyone knows your body benefits from exercise. However, people don’t use the logic that they should not exercise, but they are unable to attain becoming a professional athlete. Then why do we hold ourselves to the standard of not creating art unless it is worthy of a professional artist?
It takes courage to follow your creative path, but when you do, I believe it can lead you to a place of joy through discovery. On the path, make sure to have kind conversations with yourself about what you are creating. If you find your thoughts defaulting to destructive criticism, be curious about who taught you to judge yourself like that and is that view valid? Think about being a young child who has not learned all the scripts of self-judgment. How would your creative experience feel if the was the goal instead of the destination?
My hope is to make DonnaBellas Angels a place for you to do that, where you can let go of fear, have a creative conversation within, and share if you wish.
Thank you,
Laurel Latto
Artist & Founder of DonnaBellas Angels
DonnaBellas Angels Motto: “Medicine Heals the Body, Art Heals the Soul”